Be a Man, Be a Man

As if you couldn't allready tell the immense influence the "Macho Man" Randy Savage had on this 'lil blog of mine. Well, there's more~! And we're talking about the lesser known.. or lesser heard side of the Macho. That's right, his one of a kind, bestseller (sold over 400 copies by the way, most coming from New York.. wassupwitdat!?), oozing machismo hip-hop album: Be a Man. Leeeettt's get ready to RUMMMMBBBLEEEE (or tumble, as the Macho one might rhyme it, quite horribly)!




And there, now you've seen the album cover. Glad we got that out of the way. So, what about the music? Yes, let me give you the rundown of this baby.. since no one else has the grapefruits.. or the tolerance enough, to do it. Don't worry, I actually like some of these songs.

Tracklisting:
1) Intro
2) I'm Back
3) Ru Ready
4) Hit the Floor
5) Let's Get It On
6) Remember Me
7) Tear It Up
8) Macho Thang
9) Be a Man
10) Get Back
11) Feel the Madness
12) What's That All About
13) Gonna Be Trouble
14) Perfect Friend

Intro - Here we have the Macho acting out his actual "signing" to a record label (not a bright, nor a famous one) and pretending it was covered by the press... television-esque press, that is, not the cheesy little pro wrestling websites with a bunch of plagiarizing pansies drooling over their newest edition of WWE Magazine featuring the latest piece of eye-candy on the very misleading cover.

I'm Back - And the second pretender makes it's way on to the album, yes, allready. The Macho one claims people on the street say "Randy, you the illest". I bet, Randy, I bet. He also states "I'm back with a vengeance, and got good chemistry"..... LIES! ALL LIES!

Ru Ready (yes, it's really spelled that way) - This one was actually viable enough to be used by TNA as the theme to their weekly show "Impact!" ... for about three weeks, after that, I just can't explain what happened. Maybe they received a wake-up call - or death threats from the fans "if I have to hear that one more time!"? Who knows.

Hit the Floor - I suppose this was going to be the "club-banger"... but I don't think anyone played it, at any club, whatsoever. Maybe at one of those crazy 8th grade "my parents are out for the week, let's party!" events. But that's not where you want to be garnering attention, is it? No, not unless you're Aaron Carter (Remember him? No? Good).

Let's Get It On - This one is basically just a promotion of the Macho one's strength, brutality, and things like that. If only you could believe it. A fifty year old man who wears spandex and lathers himself with tanning lotion for a living does not scare me, no sir.

Remember Me - This one is pretty self-explanatory, you have the opening chorus: "How could you forget me? Forget all about me?" I'm guessing you can come up with the answer to that one.

Tear It Up - Bland.

Be a Man - Ah yes, if you've heard about any of these tracks before, it was this one. If you haven't, sure, I'll tell you why. This is the expertly crafted track where Randy takes a shot at his arch-nemesis and sworn enemy for life, Hulk Hogan. He shouts: "You been runnin' from Macho like I got a disease", hey Randy, maybe you do. And at this point, I don't think anyone's taking the Macho Man's side here. After all, Hulk stars in the uber-cool VH1 reality TV show "Hogan Knows Best." Where's Randy? Rumours say he'll be on the Surreal Life next season. But, note to Randy: The Surreal Life isn't a testament to your popularity - it's your testifying "why yes, I am a has-been desperate for notoriety. Thanks VH1!"

Get Back - It's a duplicate of "Tear It Up" and an echo of all-most every other song on the album. Bottom line: don't mess with Randy Savage ("messin' with Randy Savage - you're insane in the brain!")

Feel the Madness - I believe this song is defined by the line "All the ladies in the front, shake your derriere". Madness, indeed.

What's That All About - This gem here is about the Macho Man's relationship woes. I know, can you believe it (yes, despite the upcoming question mark.. it is rhetorical)? But hey, it's a nice break from his over-the-top self-promotion, eh? It also has a nice bass sound goin' on ... yeah.

Gonna Be Trouble - See: "Get Back".

Perfect Friend - A heartfelt tribute to the late, great Curt Hennig (better known as Mr. Perfect during his early 90's run with the WWF, then again in the early 2000's after the demise of WCW). Unfortunately, although this song is well intentioned and actually holds meaning unlike the other thirteen pieces on the album; it puts more of a damper on Curt's career than necessary. Nice try Macho.


And that brings us to the end of the album. For most, it's an impeccable journey through the mid-life crisis of Randy Savage. For others... well, it's the same for everybody, there's no denying it. If you wasted your fifteen bucks on this CD, the good news is it's all-most a collector's item by now... or at least I hope so, for your sake. And if not, at least you get to empathize with me ... even if I don't exactly regret buying this puppy, believe it or not.